forgotten but not gone...

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(from the beginnings of fall, 2012)
there are many things i would like to speak about but they have way too many lines of direction and would come out scattered and random. this is me trying to streamline my conscious and communication.
i could mention the experience that was my summer. all the experiences i held in my hands-a different, more alive kind of learning. and i stop right there because there is no proper place to start. it’s all coming to me so quickly, the last nine months! i haven’t had time to stop and think and instead have crammed so much into my brain. but i’m breathing through it all and noting each emotion, as burning and newborn as it is, just as much a part of the new me as the old me. 
there have been complications and will always continue to be and i take these as opportunities to only grow and move on. the prospect of aging is such terror! and such satisfaction as well. its nice to hear from friends and see the changes on their faces, how things have become less important and others, more so. i am reminded of the sensible warning to doubt my version of my best friends, to let them impress me like strangers. 

**reading these words, i am wowed. i wonder that i may feel this way for many years to come and kind of hope that i will. there is a yearning for eternal self-growth that i believe will forever burn within me**

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